Please allow me to introduce myself
I'm a May of wealth and taste
I've been around for a long, long year
Stole Maidenhead’s seat to waste
And I was 'round when Cameron
Had his moment of doubt and pain
Made damn sure that Osborne
Stood aside, and then was gone
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game
I stuck around 10 Downing Street
When I saw it was a time for a change
Saw off all other ministers
Boris Johnson screamed in vain
I rode the wave
On the general craze
When the Brexit raged
And the economy caved
I watched with glee
While the Labour party
Fought internally
And not over me
(Woo woo, woo woo)
I shouted out,
Who killed the opposition?
When after all
It was you and me
Let me please introduce myself
I'm a May of wealth and taste
And I laid traps for progressives
All shot down before they change the game
(Woo woo, who who)
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name, oh yeah
But what's confusing you
Is just the nature of my game
(Woo woo, who who)
Just as every cop is a criminal
And all the sinners saints
As heads is tails
Just call me Theresa
'Cause I'm in need of some restraint
(Who who, who who)
So if you meet me
Have some courtesy
Have some sympathy, and some taste
(Woo woo)
Use all your well-learned politics
Or I'll lay Britain to waste, mm yeah
(Woo woo, woo woo)
Pleased to meet you
Hope you guessed my name, mm yeah
(Who who)
But what's puzzling you
Is the nature of my game, mm mean it, get down
(Woo woo, woo woo)